Juri Mildeberg

I was lucky to be born into an artist's family, my father was a graphic artist and portraitist, and my mother was a housewife. My father... my father was also a homebody. Dad spent a lot of time in the studio, and my childhood perception of life was like this: when people don't sleep, they only draw, drink coffee, cook, and sometimes clean (Mom!). So my becoming an artist was an extremely logical course of action!

Why do I draw, paint, do all the things I do? It's like asking a bee why it makes these wonderful hexagonal wax honeycombs, why it fills them with honey, where does the desire to fly from flower to flower come from!? The same thing with me, it's a way of life, a "modus vivendi".

There are no problems with everyday, morning therapeutic drawing. It's so "in hand", so necessary that it happens naturally. I even think that if I couldn't draw immediately after waking up in the morning for three or four days, I would have an allergic reaction, I would be covered in blisters and start itching!

It's a different matter when I start illustrating a book! At first, the process is difficult. I just walk and exist, and I can't find any peace or place! I try different approaches and continue to fail. But then, after about a week, everything suddenly opens up! And I find the right path and exit, and then follows a month of pure work and joy! I go to bed impatiently thinking, oh, when will the morning come and I can do this pleasant thing again, and I wake up with joy that we will meet again!

And in the process, sometimes I even get the feeling that this will be a masterpiece. The work becomes such a great thing that I anticipate that everyone whose opinion I value will gasp and be delighted! (But of course, it turns out as usual! You can't jump over your own shadow!)

There is nothing funny in my creative process, but there is something interesting. Namely, I often wonder how it is possible to assemble such different faces from the same parts - nose, mouth, eyes, eyebrows, chin, and that they can be so stunningly beautiful and terribly ugly too!?

I used to go to the Tallinn railway station market with pleasure and look at all the guys messing around there. And I was surprised and happy... And I would be quite happy if someone there also looked at me and thought: "Wow, what a cool face!"